Change

Change in life is inevitable but not something that is always accepted. We change physically as we grow up. I’m pretty sure adolescents was a change for most that was not something they look back on fondly. For boys, their voice is changing and cracking, and for those a little behind on the growth spurt there is even more to cope with. For the girls, they get to become a woman and there is nothing good about this change. Feeling like your being tortured from the inside and knowing this will be how you feel every month for your foreseeable future. No thank you. Not to mention girls start to look more like women and the boys start to notice. So much change happens during this time in life. During this period you’re thinking that this is never going to end and miserable.  Only to find out in a year it wasn’t all bad. You tend to find yourself during this period of life. Change has a way of coming off as very bad,  but usually turning out for the better in the end.

Changes like this seem to happen for women many times in life, but not so much for men. Probably because women will also face more physical changes throughout life. Changes like child birth, constant weight fluctuations after having children, and of course menopause. However, women also go through more changes in life because of feelings and how they process them. It’s been said that high school sweethearts who get married typically look at their spouse in 30 years and don’t even know who the other person is anymore. Some of the most interesting parenting advice I’ve heard is…. once you’re daughter is around 17 or 18 tell her, look at this man your with and know that who he is now is who he will always be. Then ask is that something you can live with? Looking back at the guys I knew from high school, I can totally back this logic. The part that doesn’t factor in, is that who your daughter is at 17 or 18 may be ok with this person, but who she will be at 30 may not. How do you know what the future holds? You just don’t, and thus there will be some unexpected changes ahead.

Then of course there are the changes of everyday. Moving, changing jobs (or even positions in the same job), working with new people (and the personalities that come with that), marriage, family growth, separations, divorce, and the deaths of loved ones. This is all just a part of life and acceptance really is the only way to make it through these changes. This is definitely something that is usually easier said than done. Not everyone deals with change well. Change brings up fear of the unknown, anger to be taken out of the comfort zone, and guilt that this could affect others badly.

There is a saying “you can’t teach an old dog new tricks.” This applies to people probably more than dogs. Dogs just want to please their master, and will learn something new to do that, if taught in the right way. People on the other hand, get stuck in their ways (their cacoon of comfort) and are very reluctant to change. They could be miserable in the life they’re in, whether it be an abusive relationship, a loveless marriage, a job with a boss you can’t tolerate, or doing something you hate every day just to pay the bills, yet stay where they are because it’s easier to know what to expect than to expect the unknown. This doesn’t make it better though. Will making a change make it better? Who knows. It could be a wrong change, but by staying in a bad place only because you’re afraid of change you can guarantee this will be as good as it gets (how ever bad that is).

Change is the factor of life that will be with you from birth to death. In that sentence alone, there is change… birth and death. Both things that will affect and change the lives of others. It is best to learn to embrace change and take that step forward. Change will always be a little scary,  but that’s only because the unknown is a bit frightening, and fear isn’t always a bad thing.